Monday, May 22, 2006 @ 12:12 AM
Loads had been happening for the past few weeks. I managed to see a dear brother draw closer to God again, managed to adapt myself to the new changes around, and managed to finally accept my results.
I didn't do as well as I had wanted myself to do. My L1R5, sadly to say I'm not proud of it, is 32. I'm very much affected by it, because i really expected a much lower point. And I feel quite irritated by myself, because I found myself blaming God.
I studied! Everyday! So hard! So what went wrong?
Then I reflected and repented. The truth is: Even though yes, I did study and all, but I wasn't studying fruitfully. There were so much time that I could have used to focus and study. Yet I chose to spend my time unwisely. Regrets and all, I repented. Whatever the case, I'm much sure that I am going to study harder and more fruitfully, and I really want to glorify God's name.
I don't expect a result of straight A1s. I just hope to get straight B3s. for now, my results are as bad as straight C6s. So really, B3s are enough.
Northeast had new structure. This structure is a challenge for me. Functioning CL for NEB1. I need anointing from God.
At first when I got this news, I was really worried and unsure of a lot of things.
Am I good enough to lead the group? Is Gideon sure of the restructure? God, are You even sure I'm supposed to be in this plan?
God said yes. And I've learnt to take ownership of the group, and also, I've learnt that it shouldn't be I that's leading the group-
but God.
God, I pray for myself to be a vessel of blessings to Your people. I pray that You could use me well and lead the group to greater heights through me. I pray for passion and love for You in the group; I pray for joy and peace and unity; I pray for this group to have a strong relationship with you. And also, I pray for the group to thirst for more of Your Word.
This is going to be a tough, but exciting journey for me. Dear God, do everything according to Your will.
And oh. Tomorrow, actually it's later, it's the start of contacts gathering! I pray that it'd be a fruitful one! Not only will the group be more bonded, but also the contacts that we gather will be responsive! Amen!